Son,

In an earlier post I recounted an experience with my father. I was robbed, he reacted with anger and violence. I asked in the post, “What did I learn?” The post was titled “1963 – parenting in a tough world.”

It is only with forty-five years of processing that I can answer the question. The thirteen year old boy learned that there are dangerous people in the world. He learned that dangerous people must be held accountable. He learned that anger is really scary. He learned that anger works – it gets the job done. He learned that violence should be met with violence. He learned to fight. He learned to challenge bullies. I conducted much of my life under those precepts. I was like a snapping turtle – if I got a hold of an issue I would not let go until it thundered. I thought of myself as being a man of ‘principle.’ Foolishness abounded. I won many battles, and lost many wars.

Now I am an ode man, come in from the code of dark ignorance. Anger does not have to be a bad thing. We can use anger to motivate us, to invigorate us, to challenge us. Anger can be a positive social regulator. We must each defeat our Red Knight. Never allow our ’cause’ to over rule our basic moral character.

Dad