Son,

I have been sick all week. After my strenuous walk last week – the violation of self thing – I became ill. I canceled all of my planned exercise for the week while I recuperated.

Yesterday I thought that perhaps I had a minor heart attack while exercising. I thought I might have been recovering from that horrid experience. I awoke today feeling pretty well- finally.

Now I think that I was suffering from a virus of some sort – coincidentally right after getting sick while exercising. It is important to pay attention when our body talks to us. My exercise program will resume today.

Here is my fear. Am I in some sort of denial? Does the prospect of having had a minor heart attack so scare me that I have redefined the problem as a virus? That is how denial works – rationalizing experience to give us permission to continue some errant behavior.

I am going to stretch and go for a walk. I will be cautious. My three mile regular routine will become two miles for today – until I can get some feedback from my body.

I will keep you posted.

Dad