Category: Culture
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Culture

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Sexting, The Secret Codes of Youth

I am right up front on this one.  I had no idea.  But this should come as no great surprise to anyone.  Perhaps a degree of initial shock – but after some brief contemplation – not surprising.  R U getting this?  The coded language of texting and internet chatting had to contain sexual references.  Sex […]

9Dec2014 | | Comments Off on Sexting, The Secret Codes of Youth | Continued
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Thanksgiving Jokes

Gobble these up~ Q: What kind of music did the Pilgrims like? A: Plymouth Rock Q: If April showers bring May flowers, what do May flowers bring? A: Pilgrims Q: Why can’t you take a turkey to church? A: They use FOWL language. Q: Why was the Thanksgiving soup so expensive? A: It had 24 […]

22Nov2014 | | 1 comment | Continued
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A Fan’s Guide to Baseball Lingo

From a friend’s facebook post: Baseball Basics: Lingo A fan’s guide to commonly-used terms and phrases. ace — A team’s best starting pitcher. alley– The section of the outfield between the outfielders. Also “gap.” around the horn– A double play going from third base to second to first. backdoor slider — A pitch that appears […]

26Oct2014 | | Comments Off on A Fan’s Guide to Baseball Lingo | Continued
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Emotional Disturbances of a Friend

My friend is having emotional disturbances in his live – again.  I recognize this as his problem – but still I feel sadness.  He has lost his family over bitter disagreements about child raising.  He attends a therapy group where he can talk about what happened.  He reports his findings.  There are several in the […]

28Jul2014 | | Comments Off on Emotional Disturbances of a Friend | Continued
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Golf Jokes

1. These greens are so fast I have to hold my putter over the ball and hit it with the shadow. ~ Sam Snead ——————————————————————————– 2. I was three over today: One over a house, one over a patio and one over a swimming pool. ~ George Brett ——————————————————————————– 3. Actually, the only time I […]

28Jun2014 | | 1 comment | Continued
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Why Immigration Today Has Racial Overtones

I know some of the folks opposed to open immigration – they are friends and relatives – people opposed to open immigration.  These are people who are frustrated when anyone suggests their opinions are ‘racist’.  They throw up their arms in defiance – accusing ‘those liberals of always playing the race card’.  But not so […]

6Apr2014 | | Comments Off on Why Immigration Today Has Racial Overtones | Continued
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Surrender – Man’s Eternal Conflict

Surrender is personal.  Every day we are faced with decisions that concern surrender.  We surrender to traffic laws, to office protocols, to the School Evening Program of our children, to the irritable clerk at the grocery store, to unwritten codes of conduct spelled out by our particular culture.  Sometimes we surrender to our base instincts […]

27Mar2014 | | Comments Off on Surrender – Man’s Eternal Conflict | Continued
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When My Mind is Racing

Most of the folks who read my posts recognize my natural inclination toward self-righteous sarcasm.  I know that sarcasm is toxic – Mr. Clark (the Editor) tells me almost every day.  Sarcasm does serve to drive home a point.  But there is a cost to being the negative reflection of the world around us.  And […]

24Mar2014 | | 2 comments | Continued
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Irish Humor

One night, Mrs McMillen answers the door to see her husbands best friend, Paddy, standing on the doorstep. “Hello Paddy, but where is my husband? He went with you to the beer factory” Paddy shook his head. “Ah Mrs McMillen, there was a terrible accident at the beer factory, your husband fell into a vat […]

11Mar2014 | | 1 comment | Continued
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Mr. Clark and Ohg Rea Tone

Last year Mr. Clark, the Editor of this magazine took away my writing privileges because he said I was too caustic.  I got it.  I am sarcastic – and I understand sarcasm can be toxic.  I was told that I rant and rave too much.  He likes my witticisms.  He thinks I am clever.  He […]

7Mar2014 | | 1 comment | Continued
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Duck Dynasty – When Rednecks Are No Longer Funny

You might be a redneck if you go to family reunions looking for girls.  Pretty funny stuff right there.  God forgive me.  Duck Dynasty is a reality show airing on A&E.  The premise is simple – some rednecks living in the swamplands of Louisiana became rich selling hand wrought Duck calls.  But, alas, they remain […]

25Dec2013 | | Comments Off on Duck Dynasty – When Rednecks Are No Longer Funny | Continued
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The Ressurection of Ohg Rea Tone

Ohg Tone and I have been friends for forty years.  I first remember him when my oldest daughter was two years old.  Ohg showed up and brought sarcastic humor into my family.  As crude as he is – there is always a spark of humor.  Ohg became a writer for thefiresidepost.com in 2007.  After five […]

25Dec2013 | | Comments Off on The Ressurection of Ohg Rea Tone | Continued
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A Personal Fight With Social Injustice

Most of my adult life people have treated me as if I am particularly intelligent.  Some have openly called me intellectual.  My thought was usually that they were mistaken, that I am well read and speak well.  When I take a shower and dress in a suit I present pretty well.  I did not receive […]

5Dec2013 | | 3 comments | Continued
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Why Bother With Grammar?

I write.  But that does not mean that I write correctly.  I am a college graduate, but that does not mean that I use proper grammar.  I write intuitively – meaning that my sense of grammar drives my structure – and I am sometimes wrong.  Any sophisticated endeavor requires both art and science. The late […]

4Dec2013 | | Comments Off on Why Bother With Grammar? | Continued
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Redneck Christmas Shopping

Sorry folks, this is no joke.  There are redneck jokes, and those jokes work because they point out the lack of sophistication of a class of people.  For instance, you might be a redneck if you go to family reunions looking for girls.  Humor is found in the absurd, the ludicrous, the unexpected.  Redneck jokes […]

1Dec2013 | | Comments Off on Redneck Christmas Shopping | Continued
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Job – More Fun With Christians

DarkMatter2525 has come through again.  This time with the satirical interpretation of the Book of Job.  The humor is blatant, the sarcasm unveiled, the truth challenged.  My view is that these folks are doing a great service to humanity.  Any healthy Christian faith must recognize the absurdity of the literal interpretation of the Bible. Comments […]

26Nov2013 | | Comments Off on Job – More Fun With Christians | Continued
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Bible Biology – Esau and Jacob

Bible biology is always a complex matter.  If there were no complexities in bearing children (like a sterile woman) what use would we have of God? Take the case of Jacob and Esau. They would not exist without the intervention of a loving God. Well, one might have to understand that God is loving but […]

26Nov2013 | | Comments Off on Bible Biology – Esau and Jacob | Continued
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For Miranda, A Special Granddaughter

Billy Collins is an inspirational modern poet.  There is some amusing irony in this particular Colbert episode with Collins.  Collins speaks to writing out of a ‘persona’.  The irony is his interviewer is Colbert – a man who lives his life in a persona separate from himself.  But this post is not about Colbert or […]

2Nov2013 | | Comments Off on For Miranda, A Special Granddaughter | Continued
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“Life Has Killed The Dream I Dreamed”

Have you ever felt like Fantine?  Remember her – that forlorn girl of Victor Hugo’s imagination?  Hugo was a master of the forlorn, of les miserables.  We live in an unfair world.  That has been the case in my life – but life often favored me.  My life was blessed with work and play, blessed […]

28Sep2013 | | Comments Off on “Life Has Killed The Dream I Dreamed” | Continued
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Stupid Jokes From the Web

All of these jokes were taken directly from a facebook post.  Enjoy. Recently, when I went to McDonald’s I saw on the menu that you could have an order of 6, 9 or 12 Chicken McNuggets. I asked for a half dozen nuggets. ‘We don’t have half dozen nuggets,’ said the teenager at the counter. […]

6Sep2013 | | Comments Off on Stupid Jokes From the Web | Continued
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Self Pity Sarcasm

Generally speaking, sarcasm is toxic.  Sarcasm poisons conversation, debate, and relationships.  However!!!  Once in a while sarcasm is an effective tool for dramatizing that which needs to change.  Here are a few sarcastic comments on self-pity: The Pity Train has just derailed at the intersection of Suck it up and Move On, and crashed into […]

18Aug2013 | | Comments Off on Self Pity Sarcasm | Continued
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Random Humor From the Internet

  I just took a leaflet out of my mailbox, informing me that I can have sex at 79. I’m so happy, because I live at number 71. So it’s not too far to walk home afterwards. And it’s the same side of the street. I don’t even have to cross the road! ~~~~~ Answering […]

6Aug2013 | | 2 comments | Continued
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Drunk Jokes II

A drunk went to a police station wishing to speak with the burglar who had broken into his house the night before. “You’ll get your chance i court,” said the desk officer. “No, no, no!” said the man.  “I want to know how he got into the house without waking my wife.” ************************************************************************************************** “My sponsor […]

5Aug2013 | | Comments Off on Drunk Jokes II | Continued
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Twenty Dollars for Sex

Rodney Dangerfield said he suggested he and his wife have sex like they did before they were married.  She said, “OK, give me twenty dollars.” And from the net: On their wedding night, the young bride approached her new husband and asked for $20.00 for their first lovemaking encounter.  In his highly aroused state, her […]

26Jul2013 | | 1 comment | Continued
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…The Fight Started —

My wife and I were watching Who Wants To Be A Millionaire while we were in bed. I turned to her and said, ‘Do you want to have Sex?’ ‘No,’ she answered. I then said, ‘Is that your final answer?’ … She didn’t even look at me this time, simply saying, ‘Yes..’ So I said, […]

19Jul2013 | | Comments Off on …The Fight Started — | Continued
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Crude Jesus, Christmas, Church Jokes

JESUS: Jesus walks into a hotel.  He hands the room clerk three nails and says, “Can you put me up for the night? I don’t care who you are, get back in the boat and help us row. I don’t care who you are, drop that cross one more time and you are out of […]

23Jun2013 | | Comments Off on Crude Jesus, Christmas, Church Jokes | Continued
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The Oddities of Genius

Have you ever known a genius?  Genius is usually a word used to describe certain traits of intelligence.  We might say a genius has a passion for learning and has unique processing capabilities.  They generally show a creativity and intelligence beyond their peers.  Some definitions are more fixed or measurable, like the score on an […]

15Jun2013 | | Comments Off on The Oddities of Genius | Continued
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McCartney on Colbert

There is nothing we can add to this other than to say how much we appreciate Comedy Central allowing us to embed this video.  

14Jun2013 | | Comments Off on McCartney on Colbert | Continued
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Congress Jokes

The Democrat and the Republican Congressmen were arguing.  One said, “I’ll bet you five dollars you do not even know the preamble to the Constitution.  The other said, “I pledge allegiance to the United States….”  The first interrupted and said, “I didn’t think you would know it,” and handed over five dollars. “He’s so conservative […]

3Jun2013 | | Comments Off on Congress Jokes | Continued
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Suicide – The Burden of the Village

Most of us have some experience with suicide – someone we know has taken their own life.  Such a death is difficult in every possible manner.  Families cry together.  Distraught disbelief overwhelms us.  Our emotional system is shocked to the core.  We feel personally defeated.  We often feel we have failed, failed our loved one […]

25May2013 | | 3 comments | Continued
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The Cruel Hoax of Fanatics

Our dog is something of a rescue dog – she was turned over to a veterinary clinic with a gash on her head and one eye-ball literally hanging out.  We took responsibility for the dog ($800 over two years).  We do not know her age.  Obviously we know she suffered some trauma in her life.  […]

18May2013 | | Comments Off on The Cruel Hoax of Fanatics | Continued
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Trash Talk – The Elixir of Human Life

My predecessor at thefiresidepost.com, Ohg Rea Tone, was entertaining – if not always correct.  He slung sarcasm like a pig in a sty.  Mr. Tone recognized the elixir of human life was trash talk.  Those moments in life when humans harmoniously agree on everything are just the one minute break between rounds.  We can tell […]

18May2013 | | Comments Off on Trash Talk – The Elixir of Human Life | Continued
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Nostalgia from the Left and the Right – Shallow Thinking Prevails

The baseball player was right about one thing – Nostalgia is not what it used to be.  Rewriting history to favor any particular opinion is not new or unusual.  What is different is the opportunities of expression.  Social media, for example, allows for immediate dissemination of whatever nonsense is popular at the moment.  Little effort […]

9May2013 | | Comments Off on Nostalgia from the Left and the Right – Shallow Thinking Prevails | Continued
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Corresponding With an Inmate in the Missouri Department of Corrections

Geez – corresponding with an inmate in the Missouri Department of Corrections can be very rewarding – and very frustrating.  I am learning the rules as we go. My friend Joey is serving time for his fourth DWI.  I do not dispute the sentence – DWI is a serious offense.  Driving while intoxicated is responsible […]

1May2013 | | 1 comment | Continued
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12 Step Sayings, One Day at a Time

The first book under the publishing imprint of The Fireside Post is now available on Amazon.com. Search Amazon books for “12 Step Sayings” to quickly find the book. Or click here Over 720 slogans and sayings from 12 Step Programs have been organized by date – from January 1 through December 31. Easy to understand, […]

16Apr2013 | | Comments Off on 12 Step Sayings, One Day at a Time | Continued
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Drunk Jokes

A local City Council is thinking of closing the bars earlier.  If you can’t get drunk by midnight you are not trying. A man should learn that martinis and a woman’s breasts have a lot in common.  One isn’t enough and three is too many. A man recently went on a drinking man’s diet.  He […]

15Mar2013 | | Comments Off on Drunk Jokes | Continued
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Men Jokes

A man is  happily married.  He has a wife who works while he stays home, a wife who cooks, and a wife who has sex like rabbits – Hopefully they will never meet. Some men say they can understand women.  They are either psychiatrists or in need of one. A dietician was lecturing on the […]

15Mar2013 | | 1 comment | Continued
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Grand Canyon Toenails and Grease Bombs

Like humans, the Colorado River traverses the path it carved.  The Grand Canyon is the ultimate in manifest Karma.  A harsh, brutal, climate created some of the greatest wonders on this planet.  For some reason people like to go there.  We like to float down the river.  We like the danger of the rapids, the […]

7Mar2013 | | 1 comment | Continued
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Physician Jokes

Doctors are brilliant.  They cure poor people faster. My doctor told me I had two weeks to live.  I hope they are not in August. The receptionist said, “Let me get your medical history.  Do you pay your bills on time?” When a doctor wants a consultation that means he is calling in an accomplice. […]

2Mar2013 | | Comments Off on Physician Jokes | Continued
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Golf Jokes

A very fine young woman once said, “Give me golf clubs, fresh air, and a handsome young golfing partner.  You can keep the clubs and the fresh air.” If you have a hard time meeting new people just try picking up the wrong golf ball. “I’ll bet there are people worse at golf than me.”  […]

28Feb2013 | | Comments Off on Golf Jokes | Continued
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Choosing the Right Coffee House

To get started in finding the right experience with coffee, you have to choose a coffee house. This is important because there are a lot of coffee houses out there that are expensive and cushy, but do not fall into the “micro-brew” coffee house category. Micro-brew coffee shops will roast their own coffees on the […]

21Feb2013 | | 1 comment | Continued
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Farm Jokes

I met a farmer who was a magician.  He turned a cow into a field. We were in the country, standing by wishing well.  My wife fell in.  I had no idea those things really worked. What this country needs is a lie detector that seed catalogs can take. We tried mating cows and mules […]

18Feb2013 | | Comments Off on Farm Jokes | Continued
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Famous Last Words

I don’t burn.  I tan. Is there anything that I can do? General Custer commanded, “Men, don’t take any prisoners!” If you had any brains or ambition you would not be a traffic policeman. Give me a match, I think the tank is empty. Take off your clothes, the doctor will be with you in […]

15Feb2013 | | Comments Off on Famous Last Words | Continued
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Elephant Jokes

Why does the elephant wear red sneakers.? So he can hide in the strawberry patch. How do you get six elephants in a Ford Focus?  Three in the front and three in the back. Why do elephants have flat feet?  So they can stand on marshmallows. Why do elephants stand on marshmallows?  So they won’t […]

15Feb2013 | | Comments Off on Elephant Jokes | Continued
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Ego Humor

He’s not egotistical.  He just loves intelligent people. He collects his own autographs. Some people think they know everything.  They irritate those of us who do. His marriage was a triangle:  Him, his wife, and him. He never takes a hot shower, it clouds his mirror. He found his better half in a mirror. Fall […]

15Feb2013 | | Comments Off on Ego Humor | Continued
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Celebrating Ignorance In Missouri

Ok, I admit, I live in Missouri.  For many years I justified this existence by saying I was close to my family.  That defense is losing ground.  Missouri is not an unusual “Red State” (meaning it votes new age Republican).  My thought is that Missouri is representative of that whole block of right wing fanatics […]

1Feb2013 | | Comments Off on Celebrating Ignorance In Missouri | Continued
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Bearing the Sword of Justice

I am Aries, born under Mars. I swing a heavy sword, the heavy sword of justice. The sword strikes at ignorance, at injustice, at human frailty. A child is threatened. Captured by the rogue of the closed mind. The child, once destined for greatness, becomes the rogue. Small town America, a bastion of self righteous […]

17Jan2013 | | Comments Off on Bearing the Sword of Justice | Continued
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Jef Foxworthy on Being a Missourian

(This was taken in its entirety from an email). Missouri according to Jeff Foxworthy: If someone in a Home Depot store offers you assistance and they don’t even work there, you may live in Missouri. If you’ve worn shorts and a jacket at the same time, you may live in Missouri. … If you’ve had […]

5Jan2013 | | Comments Off on Jef Foxworthy on Being a Missourian | Continued
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The Stuppy & Clark Expeditionary Force

Bryan Stuppy, LISW, LADAC, a leading psychologist in New Mexico, has asked me to join him on an Expeditionary Force to study the effects of primal living in a nomadic tribal environment.  The ruse has been established.  The ‘tribe’ thinks they are to study the effects of man-made flooding in the Grand Canyon.  In reality […]

9Nov2012 | | Comments Off on The Stuppy & Clark Expeditionary Force | Continued
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Old Men Walking, And Falling Down

I am a senior.  That is the life designation we get when we are between middle age and elderly.  My health is generally good.  I walk about three miles every day and as a result I take no medications for any heart or respiratory conditions.  But walking of late has become a treacherous proposition.  I […]

23Oct2012 | | Comments Off on Old Men Walking, And Falling Down | Continued