Son,

Some wacko California Hippie commented on my parenting post, I will address them: – I can make mistakes as a parent if I want to. I don’t know who you are but you are almost correct. Well, you are correct – but be careful. I know several people my age who beat their children into submission and the children later ended in prison. Some of those parents believe today that their error was that did not beat the children hard enough or long enough.

Making mistakes does not guarantee a learning experience. I live in fear that I will completely miss the boat – that I will become one of those gnarled old people, sitting in a rocking chair in the corner of my son’s living room on Christmas Eve, grumbling about how he could have turned out if he had only listened to me.

Learning from mistakes is the absolute most difficult thing in my life – because I first have to admit that I made a mistake. Whoeeeee! I hate that. Especially when someone is gloating over me!! But who do I give power to? The immature gloater? Do I allow pride to dominate my life? Does it serve any purpose to blame my children for how they grew up – Does it serve any purpose to blame myself?

Humility probably serves best. Humility should not be confused with humiliation. True humility is the balanced middle between self-deprecating humiliation and false, unhealthy prIde. Humility is a healthy self-esteem, recognizing that all people are equal – different but equal. Different talents, gifts, and strengths; Different frailties, nuances, and personality disturbances. Different but equal. We are equal in our humanness. Humility recognizes that we make mistakes – and it is actually healthy to accept and learn from those mistakes.

I have invested many years in trying to root out the errors of my ways – I did pretty well with most of the stuff – but there are a couple of flaws that I rather enjoy – call me crazy.

Dad