Son,

Have you ever heard of the Pordopoddies – a Native American tribe of what is now Kansas. At least one of the current candidates for president is an ideological descendant of this little known, but important, tribe. You grew up on the Great Plains of America. You should know some of the mythology of the great western migration by European Immigrants. Your great grandparents came to this area by covered wagon in the early 1900’s – by then the Pordopoddies were more civilized and reading the Torah.

The Pordopoddies were resourceful folks. They managed to eek out a living by chasing buffalo – very few of them were obese. The evolution of their homes led to a mastery of structural design. The early homes were, of course, caves. Because there are so few caves in Kansas, the growing population of Pordopoddies were forced to find other sources of protection from the arctic north winds. Only the most hearty grass could grow on these desolate plains and the Pordopoddies soon learned to build sod caves for protection. This became a problem because they did not have wheels and the sod houses were difficult to drag along with the restless buffalo herds. The ingenious Pordopoddies discovered that long wood poles and buffalo hides could fashion adequate housing. They called their homes trymadids, because of the triangular shape – and the similarity to the structures of their cousins in Egypt, Oklahoma. These trymadids could be easily moved by raging buffaloes. All was well in Kansas.

Then came the Europeans. The Pordopoddies called them fancipants, because the canvas of the covered wagons was always fanning in the breeze. The name later took on other meanings. The western travelers were primarily modest city folks and were not totally prepared for the journey across the plains.

The Pordopoddies, ever resourceful, recognized this modesty. They soon found that following a purposeful wagon train was easier than following an aimless buffalo. They pitched small trymadids over holes dug in the ground, always in close proximity to the wagon encampments. For ten cents, the European Immigrants could maintain their dignity.

The Pordopoddies would latter settle in an area that is now known as southern Nevada. Their descendants cater to weary travelers yet today.

Dad