John McCain had a news flash for Americans in the town hall debate the other day.  McCain was clever in demonstrating his comprehension of American politics.  Some of his jargon is difficult to follow – probably because his language was affected while serving as a POW.

Highlights from McCain’s debate answers:

The moderator is a polish immigrant, but he has a green card so McCain likes him.  If all goes well Brokowski will be granted amnesty.  Brokowski will ask the questions.

Brokowski:  What about the economy, what you gonna do bout that?  That’s what I always wanted to know?

McCain: “My friends, and you are my friends, because I was a POW.  Friends don’t poke friends with sticks in bamboo cages – no one in this room has ever poked me with a stick.  Thank you my friends.”

Brokowski: “Mr. Obama, you have used up your time so we will move on to Senator McCain.  Senator, What about Health care.  That’s what I always wanted to know?

McCain: “Mr friends, none of you are in the hospital, you are here at this debate.  We can see by your presence that the Health Care system is working.  My friends, did you drive here?  I bet you did, that is because we are drilling for whale oil.  I learned the value of whale oil while I was a POW.”

Borkowski: “Mr. Obama, you were never in Vietnam so you will not be asked to answer questions on the Iraq War.  Senator McCain, Why has the surge been so successful?  That is what I always wanted to know?”

McCain: “My friends, when I was a POW they did not do a surge.  My fellow POW’s and I used to sit around at night, wishing a General Patreaus would come here and give economic relief to our captors.  We wanted the government to come here and rebuild the bridges we had bombed.  If only the American Government would come here and rebuild the schools we bombed, then the Viet Cong would stop poking us with sticks.  My Friends, I know about war, I was a POW, I know how to appease our enemies.  Can I have another minute my friend Mr. Brokowski?”

Brokowski: “Sure, I worked this out with your campaign before hand.”

McCain: “When I was a POW we thought the best solution to our dilemma would be for our government to invade Iraq.  Our thought was that the Viet Cong would go to Iraq to help their comrades and they would quit poking us with sticks my friends.”

Brokowski: “The most important decision of you campaign was your choice for Vice President.  We all know Senator Joe Biden so we need not examine that issue.  So Senator McCain, are you happy with the charming and beautiful Governor Sarah Palin?  That is what I always wanted to know.”

McCain: “My friends, some people thought I did not look her over good enough before making my choice.  I can assure you I looked her over closely – just look at the video of her introductory speech.  I was looking her over even then.  When I was a POW I learned to appreciate American women.  My fellow POW’s and I used to spend our evenings talking about American women.  I happen to have that video with with me.  Can we show that now Mr. Brokowski?”

Brokowski: “This would be a good way to wrap up the evening debate.  I always wanted to see this video.”