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Political Correctness – Applying Manners Across The Board
I grew up in a lower class mixed race neighborhood. At age twenty-two, with no college training, I went to work in an office, wearing a coat and tie. I was rude and crude. But I have to say that by today’s standards we were all somewhat rude and crude – times change and polite […]
14Oct2015 | Ohg Rea Tone | Comments Off on Political Correctness – Applying Manners Across The Board | ContinuedMr. Mullinax
I was once a young man, in a land far away. Well, about two miles from where I sit today. Methodist Hospital hired me as a Computer Operator three weeks before my first child was born. Actually, Larry Koch hired me – he was the Computer Operations Manager. His boss was John Mullinax. John was […]
13Oct2015 | Gary Clark | 1 comment | ContinuedStop Fighting
Most of us do not know how to fight. Sadly, most of us think we do know. We are proud of our wit, our sarcasm, our humor at the expense of others. If not, then we act as if we are in control – proudly and falsely saying that we would not ‘stoop to that […]
9Oct2015 | Ohg Rea Tone | Comments Off on Stop Fighting | ContinuedPerceptions and Homemade Bread
Before I get much further, I just want to say this is not, a crying in your beer or milk, sob story of a life in poverty. Now that’s out of the way and here we go. I am the second child of the nine children my mother gave birth to. If my mother was […]
4Oct2015 | Nancy Belle | 1 comment | ContinuedQuotes from Yogi Berra
1. “It ain’t over till it’s over.” 2. “It’s deja vu all over again.” 3. “I usually take a two-hour nap from 1 to 4.” 4. “Never answer an anonymous letter.” 5. “We made too many wrong mistakes.” 6. “You can observe a lot by watching.” 7. “The future ain’t what it used to be.” […]
24Sep2015 | Ohg Rea Tone | Comments Off on Quotes from Yogi Berra | ContinuedLadies and Gentlemen, Germans and Gents….
Another song from childhood: Ladies and gentlemen, Germans and gents, Cross-eyed mosquitoes and bowlegged ants, I come before you because I am not behind you to tell you something I know nothing of. One bright day in the middle of the night two dead boys got up to fight back to back they faced each […]
6Sep2015 | Ohg Rea Tone | Comments Off on Ladies and Gentlemen, Germans and Gents…. | ContinuedA Horse, A Flea, And Three Blind Mice
I learned this song as a child, taught it to my children and some grandchildren. A horse and a flea and the three blind mice were sitting on a tombstone rolling dice, the horse fell down and landed on the flea, oops said the flea there’s a horse on me. Boom Boom aint it great […]
6Sep2015 | Ohg Rea Tone | Comments Off on A Horse, A Flea, And Three Blind Mice | ContinuedI Am Woman, Stand By Your Man – Helen Reddy vs. Tammy Wynette
Helen Reddy gained notoriety on her first hit “I Am Woman” (1972). Her hit stood in stark contrast to Tammy Wynette’s “Stand By Your Man” (1968). Released just four years apart – these two songs reflected the division in a changing culture from the 1960’s to the 1970’s. In 2015 we stand at another reflection […]
27Aug2015 | Ohg Rea Tone | 1 comment | ContinuedHammering Bill Cosby
Judd Apatow is a comedian – with skills perhaps not equal to Bill Cosby – but astoundingly accurate when portraying the beleaguered comedian. Apatow uses Cosby’s own style to hammer home a point – a point that must be made. This routine is entirely appropriate and dead on: Here is the link
21Jul2015 | Ohg Rea Tone | Comments Off on Hammering Bill Cosby | ContinuedWhy Did The Chicken Cross The Road?
Why Did The Chicken Cross The Road? SARAH PALIN: The chicken crossed the road because, gosh-darn it, he’s a maverick! BARACK OBAMA: Let me be perfectly clear, if the chickens like their eggs they can keep their eggs. No chicken will be required to cross the road to surrender her eggs. Period. JOHN McCAIN: My […]
12Jul2015 | Ohg Rea Tone | Comments Off on Why Did The Chicken Cross The Road? | ContinuedWhen Sadness Overwhelms Us
All of us experience grief. As children we see our grand parents pass. We lose our pets, great aunts and uncles. We lose games of school sports. We fail to make the team. These are the experiences that help prepare us for the more grave loss of parents, siblings, spouses. Sadly some of lose our […]
11Jun2015 | Ohg Rea Tone | Comments Off on When Sadness Overwhelms Us | ContinuedWhen Seniors Look For Love
OK – right off I have to admit that I am a senior. That is the demilitarized zone between middle age and elderly. This is but one account of love in a life well lived, and the hope for love yet to come. Life has bestowed many blessings on this old man. Good women have […]
10Jun2015 | Ohg Rea Tone | 1 comment | ContinuedBlonde Jokes
“An old, blind cowboy wanders into an all-girl biker bar by mistake… He finds his way to a bar stool and orders a shot of Jack Daniels. After sitting there for a while, he yells to the bartender, ‘Hey, you wanna hear a blonde joke?’ The bar immediately falls absolutely silent. In a very deep, […]
31May2015 | Ohg Rea Tone | Comments Off on Blonde Jokes | ContinuedStupid Jokes (jokes about being stupid)
Captured from the internet: Recently, when I went to McDonald’s I saw on the menu that you could have an order of 6, 9 or 12 Chicken McNuggets. I asked for a half dozen nuggets. ‘We don’t have half dozen nuggets,’ said the teenager at the counter. ‘You don’t?’ I replied. ‘We only have six, […]
31May2015 | Ohg Rea Tone | Comments Off on Stupid Jokes (jokes about being stupid) | ContinuedPuns
We picked these up from the internet: .. A thief who stole a calendar got twelve months. .. When the smog lifts in Los Angeles U.C.L.A. .. The batteries were given out free of charge. .. A dentist and a manicurist married. They fought tooth and nail. .. A will is a dead giveaway. .. […]
28Jan2015 | Ohg Rea Tone | Comments Off on Puns | ContinuedAdvice From Farmer John
Farmer John and I do not always agree on politics – but he does have some simple but wise thoughts about life. I found this posted on facebook: Your fences need to be horse-high, pig-tight and bull-strong. Keep skunks and bankers at a distance. Life is simpler when you plow around the stump. A bumble […]
15Jan2015 | Ohg Rea Tone | Comments Off on Advice From Farmer John | ContinuedTrial of John Doy
TRIAL OF JOHN DOY.In the month of January, 1859, Wm. A. Newman, of Platte County, had a favorite servant to run away from his home, in Weston, to Lawrence, Kansas. Dick being an active, intelligent and skillful carpenter, Newman offered a large reward, and in the month of February, 1859, at a point fourteen miles […]
9Jan2015 | Ohg Rea Tone | Comments Off on Trial of John Doy | Continued“It Was So Cold…” (Cold Jokes)
From the internet: It was so cold . . . we had to stop eating with metal cutlery. Some people walked around for days with spoons or forks stuck to their tongues! It was so cold… hitchhikers were holding up pictures of thumbs! It was so cold… roosters were rushing into Kentucky Fried Chicken and […]
8Jan2015 | Ohg Rea Tone | Comments Off on “It Was So Cold…” (Cold Jokes) | ContinuedThe Absurdy Of Private Humor
My friend has a girlfriend – she lives in another State. I assumed that refers to geography rather than a mindset. He told me that he called her and they talked for two hours. He called the next day and she reported that she is running out of minutes so she cannot talk again until […]
10Dec2014 | Ohg Rea Tone | Comments Off on The Absurdy Of Private Humor | ContinuedSexting, The Secret Codes of Youth
I am right up front on this one. I had no idea. But this should come as no great surprise to anyone. Perhaps a degree of initial shock – but after some brief contemplation – not surprising. R U getting this? The coded language of texting and internet chatting had to contain sexual references. Sex […]
9Dec2014 | Gary Clark | Comments Off on Sexting, The Secret Codes of Youth | Continued“Let It Begin With Me”
Occasionally we hear quotes, slogans, sayings, something that seems innocuous on the surface, but resonates with wisdom upon further inspection. Al-Anon, a program for the families and friends of Alcoholics, has official slogans which are raised to the level of proverb, of wisdom, of scripture in the program. One such saying is “Let It Begin […]
8Dec2014 | Gary Clark | 4 comments | ContinuedThanksgiving Jokes
Gobble these up~ Q: What kind of music did the Pilgrims like? A: Plymouth Rock Q: If April showers bring May flowers, what do May flowers bring? A: Pilgrims Q: Why can’t you take a turkey to church? A: They use FOWL language. Q: Why was the Thanksgiving soup so expensive? A: It had 24 […]
22Nov2014 | Ohg Rea Tone | 1 comment | ContinuedA Fan’s Guide to Baseball Lingo
From a friend’s facebook post: Baseball Basics: Lingo A fan’s guide to commonly-used terms and phrases. ace — A team’s best starting pitcher. alley– The section of the outfield between the outfielders. Also “gap.” around the horn– A double play going from third base to second to first. backdoor slider — A pitch that appears […]
26Oct2014 | Ohg Rea Tone | Comments Off on A Fan’s Guide to Baseball Lingo | ContinuedMore on My Emotionally Disturbed Friend
I wrote recently on the escapades of my emotionally disturbed friend – well – today saw a significant turn of events. I thought about writing the other day to report that life seemed better for that man of great hurt and grief. I would have said I thought he had turned a positive corner. He […]
11Oct2014 | Ohg Rea Tone | Comments Off on More on My Emotionally Disturbed Friend | ContinuedJust One More Alcoholic Story
Note from Ohg Tone – I am just passing this story along. I changed the names to protect all. By-line: Tommy C. Last January we started a new Al-Ann group at our Alano Club in St. Joseph, Missouri. We have just finished restoring the room. http://alanostjoe.com/2014/08/09/new-hope-al-anon-has-a-fresh-look/ About a month ago, while working on that room, […]
26Aug2014 | Ohg Rea Tone | Comments Off on Just One More Alcoholic Story | ContinuedEmotional Disturbances of a Friend
My friend is having emotional disturbances in his live – again. I recognize this as his problem – but still I feel sadness. He has lost his family over bitter disagreements about child raising. He attends a therapy group where he can talk about what happened. He reports his findings. There are several in the […]
28Jul2014 | Ohg Rea Tone | Comments Off on Emotional Disturbances of a Friend | ContinuedGolf Jokes
1. These greens are so fast I have to hold my putter over the ball and hit it with the shadow. ~ Sam Snead ——————————————————————————– 2. I was three over today: One over a house, one over a patio and one over a swimming pool. ~ George Brett ——————————————————————————– 3. Actually, the only time I […]
28Jun2014 | Ohg Rea Tone | 1 comment | ContinuedA Man With No Peer
I am an odd sort of person. Raised in most humble circumstances, self educated by fondness for reading and natural curiosity, disturbed by the cruelty of a humble upbringing, unprepared for adult life, anxious over fear of failure, self medicated, weary of responsibility, responsible out of necessity, driven by undisciplined intellect, possessed by a moral […]
24Apr2014 | Ohg Rea Tone | Comments Off on A Man With No Peer | ContinuedWhy Immigration Today Has Racial Overtones
I know some of the folks opposed to open immigration – they are friends and relatives – people opposed to open immigration. These are people who are frustrated when anyone suggests their opinions are ‘racist’. They throw up their arms in defiance – accusing ‘those liberals of always playing the race card’. But not so […]
6Apr2014 | Ohg Rea Tone | Comments Off on Why Immigration Today Has Racial Overtones | ContinuedMunicipal Smoking Bans – Solid Redneck Reasoning
Some scoundrels in St. Joe, Missouri, are trying again to ban smoking at the places where they go for their Sunday morning brunch. The opposition swigs their beer and pops peanuts between puffs on their favorite means of getting their regular nicotine hit. Some prefer cigarettes, some a cigar, personally – I favor a pipe. […]
1Apr2014 | Ohg Rea Tone | 2 comments | ContinuedSurrender – Man’s Eternal Conflict
Surrender is personal. Every day we are faced with decisions that concern surrender. We surrender to traffic laws, to office protocols, to the School Evening Program of our children, to the irritable clerk at the grocery store, to unwritten codes of conduct spelled out by our particular culture. Sometimes we surrender to our base instincts […]
27Mar2014 | Ohg Rea Tone | Comments Off on Surrender – Man’s Eternal Conflict | ContinuedWhen My Mind is Racing
Most of the folks who read my posts recognize my natural inclination toward self-righteous sarcasm. I know that sarcasm is toxic – Mr. Clark (the Editor) tells me almost every day. Sarcasm does serve to drive home a point. But there is a cost to being the negative reflection of the world around us. And […]
24Mar2014 | Ohg Rea Tone | 2 comments | ContinuedConstitutional Conservative is an Oxymoron
Our Founding Fathers were some of the most liberal people on the planet – then and now. Consider the questions they had to ask, and their answers in the form of our Constitution. Remember – they were forming a completely new government. Where shall power reside? Three branches of government with checks and balances – […]
20Mar2014 | Ohg Rea Tone | Comments Off on Constitutional Conservative is an Oxymoron | ContinuedFounding Fathers Commentary on Religion
“If I could conceive that the general government might ever be so administered as to render the liberty of conscience insecure, I beg you will be persuaded, that no one would be more zealous than myself to establish effectual barriers against the horrors of spiritual tyranny, and every species of religious persecution.” – George […]
18Mar2014 | Ohg Rea Tone | Comments Off on Founding Fathers Commentary on Religion | ContinuedIrish Humor
One night, Mrs McMillen answers the door to see her husbands best friend, Paddy, standing on the doorstep. “Hello Paddy, but where is my husband? He went with you to the beer factory” Paddy shook his head. “Ah Mrs McMillen, there was a terrible accident at the beer factory, your husband fell into a vat […]
11Mar2014 | Ohg Rea Tone | 1 comment | ContinuedThe Irony of Ohg Rea Tone – the Conflict of Ideology
Ohg Rea Tone struggles, like others who believe wholeheartedly in their own point of view. The simple twist of fate put Mr. Tone on the left side of most issues. Had the shoe of the other foot fallen a few millimeters to the right, Mr. Tone would sound the same, look the same, feel the […]
10Mar2014 | Gary Clark | Comments Off on The Irony of Ohg Rea Tone – the Conflict of Ideology | ContinuedMr. Clark and Ohg Rea Tone
Last year Mr. Clark, the Editor of this magazine took away my writing privileges because he said I was too caustic. I got it. I am sarcastic – and I understand sarcasm can be toxic. I was told that I rant and rave too much. He likes my witticisms. He thinks I am clever. He […]
7Mar2014 | Ohg Rea Tone | 1 comment | ContinuedMoveon.org Medicaid Petition
26Jan2014 | Ohg Rea Tone | Comments Off on Moveon.org Medicaid Petition | ContinuedDuck Dynasty – When Rednecks Are No Longer Funny
You might be a redneck if you go to family reunions looking for girls. Pretty funny stuff right there. God forgive me. Duck Dynasty is a reality show airing on A&E. The premise is simple – some rednecks living in the swamplands of Louisiana became rich selling hand wrought Duck calls. But, alas, they remain […]
25Dec2013 | Ohg Rea Tone | Comments Off on Duck Dynasty – When Rednecks Are No Longer Funny | ContinuedThe Ressurection of Ohg Rea Tone
Ohg Tone and I have been friends for forty years. I first remember him when my oldest daughter was two years old. Ohg showed up and brought sarcastic humor into my family. As crude as he is – there is always a spark of humor. Ohg became a writer for thefiresidepost.com in 2007. After five […]
25Dec2013 | Gary Clark | Comments Off on The Ressurection of Ohg Rea Tone | ContinuedFaith or Ideology – Checking Personal Morality
This guy “Francis, Pope” made some comments recently regarding Christian ideology. He must be famous or something because the internet is frying cables in dispensing his remarks. Who he is is not as important was what he said. I believe that words and ideas stand alone, regardless of who conjured them. Mr. Francis said something […]
10Dec2013 | Gary Clark | Comments Off on Faith or Ideology – Checking Personal Morality | ContinuedA Personal Fight With Social Injustice
Most of my adult life people have treated me as if I am particularly intelligent. Some have openly called me intellectual. My thought was usually that they were mistaken, that I am well read and speak well. When I take a shower and dress in a suit I present pretty well. I did not receive […]
5Dec2013 | Gary Clark | 3 comments | ContinuedWhy Bother With Grammar?
I write. But that does not mean that I write correctly. I am a college graduate, but that does not mean that I use proper grammar. I write intuitively – meaning that my sense of grammar drives my structure – and I am sometimes wrong. Any sophisticated endeavor requires both art and science. The late […]
4Dec2013 | Gary Clark | Comments Off on Why Bother With Grammar? | ContinuedRedneck Christmas Shopping
Sorry folks, this is no joke. There are redneck jokes, and those jokes work because they point out the lack of sophistication of a class of people. For instance, you might be a redneck if you go to family reunions looking for girls. Humor is found in the absurd, the ludicrous, the unexpected. Redneck jokes […]
1Dec2013 | Gary Clark | Comments Off on Redneck Christmas Shopping | ContinuedMars conjunct Mars – A Friendly Warning
My friend of many years does the Astrology thing. My personal aversion to Astrology is less than my aversion to other more acceptable organized religions. My friend happens to test genius on IQ tests. He is also well educated with terminal degrees. He reads, he thinks, he ponders, he hikes mountains and canyons, his is […]
27Nov2013 | Gary Clark | Comments Off on Mars conjunct Mars – A Friendly Warning | ContinuedJob – More Fun With Christians
DarkMatter2525 has come through again. This time with the satirical interpretation of the Book of Job. The humor is blatant, the sarcasm unveiled, the truth challenged. My view is that these folks are doing a great service to humanity. Any healthy Christian faith must recognize the absurdity of the literal interpretation of the Bible. Comments […]
26Nov2013 | Gary Clark | Comments Off on Job – More Fun With Christians | ContinuedBible Biology – Esau and Jacob
Bible biology is always a complex matter. If there were no complexities in bearing children (like a sterile woman) what use would we have of God? Take the case of Jacob and Esau. They would not exist without the intervention of a loving God. Well, one might have to understand that God is loving but […]
26Nov2013 | Gary Clark | Comments Off on Bible Biology – Esau and Jacob | ContinuedClimate Change Is About Rate Of Change And Individualism
We have argued before that climate change is about rate of change. Our planet has been as much as fourteen degrees hotter than our current temperatures and life flourished. Dinosaurs roamed the lush tropical forests of South Dakota. Scientists have known for years that we are not going to bake in the oven. The question […]
20Nov2013 | Gary Clark | Comments Off on Climate Change Is About Rate Of Change And Individualism | ContinuedTesting! Nuclear Testing! Guess How Many Nuclear Tests Have Been Conducted
Other than a few lost tribes in the Amazon people are aware of nuclear bombs. We know some things, like which countries have the capability, which countries want the capability, which countries we do not want to have the capability, and which countries have nuclear warheads mounted on intercontinental ballistic missiles. All scary things by […]
16Nov2013 | Gary Clark | 2 comments | ContinuedFor Miranda, A Special Granddaughter
Billy Collins is an inspirational modern poet. There is some amusing irony in this particular Colbert episode with Collins. Collins speaks to writing out of a ‘persona’. The irony is his interviewer is Colbert – a man who lives his life in a persona separate from himself. But this post is not about Colbert or […]
2Nov2013 | Gary Clark | Comments Off on For Miranda, A Special Granddaughter | Continued